> Grab a trusty weapon from the chest, THEN jump out of the room guns metaphorically blazing

You open your chest to find a weapon. Inside you find...

A smaller chest!

You swing the smaller chest down. Yes. This will serve as the perfect weapon. All you have to do is hit Hall Monitors with it, and they will take a long nap with no side effects. You learned this from movies.

You are now ready for your ADVENTURE!

... GIRL

Title Drop.

You metaphorically blaze your guns exiting your room, while your tulpa follows. Adventure awaits!