I've had a hell of a day
So I was walking home from a visit to my parents and I see like a light in the distance getting brighter and then next thing I know I'm like in some fucking fancy royal court type place with like tons of people looking at me and a king and shit and he said a bunch of stuff to me about quests and heros so I asked if there was a toilet BC I'm fucking scared so now I'm just sitting here on a wooden plank with a hole in it and for some reason despite no signal I can still access this site!??
I'm kinda freaking out here and don't know where I am or what to do, am I dead? Have I lost it? Am I being punished for liking the epilogues??
I just need to talk to another person and figure out what I'm going to do
help a girl out
you're being punished for not liking the epilogues enough
the epilogues are the best part of homestuck
--you're being punished for not liking the epilogues enough--
Possibly fair!!! But also!!! Help!! I promi once I'm safe and able to ill read em all over again!
have you tried killing the king
the epilogues are the best part of homestuck
--have you tried killing the king--
Ok see I'm a big ol' lefty so I would, but there are scary men with polearms, a lot of them, and also a guy who I'm p sure was some sort of wizard,
Fuck they're knocking and asking if I'm ok shitshitshit
Lock In just say agree with everything they say and then you can figure it out after the fact.
Sign my petition for Meat!Roxy to formally change his name to Remy.
be the best liar you can be right this moment
--Lock In just say agree with everything they say and then you can figure it out after the fact.--
Ok yeah this might be my best bet.... I'm a bit calmed down now (a bit) so I'm gonna go back out there and try not to get stoned as a witch.... Hopefully I'll find some time to get my phone out and update youse
--be the best liar you can be right this moment--
Ok but what do I even lie about??
say you're like a royal or noble or something from out of town and you just stopped in to visit and shit and you just don't have your servants with you because you're like SUPER humble and down to earth. They'll buy it, trust.
Ok big chat with the king happened, been given a room to rest up in which was nice.
Was called a visitor from another realm, so thought playing it off as a local noble may be difficult, especially after the sudden appearance in front of everyone, hope youse don't mind but I decided to call myself my realms greatest hero, the guy seemed to buy it.
That's the good news, the bad news is, I'm apparently the perfect candidate to undertake a mission of "grave importance". Apparently some lich type guy is fucking with everything here? Idk they were vague about that part, but I'm putting my drama club skills to work and yes-anding the fuck outta these medievaly guys
I had a look outside and honestly this place is looking kinda shitty, like not just old-timey shitty, they've got like, crazy urchins. Also some cool lizard people tho, gonna have to figure out how to react to that later.
More bad news: my phone won't tell the fucking time, sometimes minutes on the clock pass like seconds, sometimes they won't change for what feels like ages, seems to line up with my posting at least.
I'll prob hear more about this "mission" business soon, right now I'm gonna sit here and process all this. Idk how to pass the time so like, suggest/ask stuff ig?
Oh yeah that guy I saw is definely a wizard I saw him float the king outta his throne
I wish I told my friends and gfs to get fraf accounts, I hope they're ok
> Sing a ballad about the king's beautiful queen
> Realise the king is a homosexual
> Sing a ballad about the king's beautiful queen
I'm not much of a singer, or a lyricist for that matter ~w~
> Realise the king is a homosexual
Yknow maybe? No queen in sight, may keep an eye on his relationship with his jester....
What's The Tea Like There? And The Other Food Too?
--What's The Tea Like There? And The Other Food Too?--
:D they threw me(?) a feast! idk like i was there and they talked about quests, but at the head of the table was like some knighty looking guy and i was just kinda in the middle between 2 of the polearm guys, not awfully chatty ~w~
Food! there was so much!! biggest roast bird ive ever seen! like person big!! tasted kinda weird, earthy >:p and there was like no spice!! all just salted roast meat, these people cant cook!!!!! ~w~
All sortsa speeches happening but girllllll i was eating it feels like i havent eaten in WEEKS
After the feast i got some fukin cheesecake though lets go. Being honest it was still p bland but comparitavely it was amazing
gave me some tea as i returned to my room! its like minty, but also sweet, and kinda berry-y ykno? idk im fukin wiped i just ate like half my bodymass in roast meat, pgone clock may be fukt but i know a sunset when i see one, hopefully this tea doesnt turn me into a mouse ~w~
> hopefully this tea doesnt turn me into a mouse ~w~
I Know That Reference. My Gf And I Read A Couple Of Routes In That Game.