This is just a list of Homestuck things that don't make sense to me, largely kept for my own use. Some of these don't have answers because they're ongoing mysteries, but I assume most do. If you do happen to know the answers to any of these, feel free to comment them.
What’s with the weird sun and red sky near Dave's place? (pg. 444)
How the FUCK did Jade get her hands on one of Doc Scratch's Cue Balls? Doc Scratch doesn’t even exist in B1! (pg. 805)
Why/How does the universe end if Snowman dies?
How long is Karkat’s lifespan? He's not on the hemospectrum at all, so...
How the hell does John know what trolls look like? (pg. 1714)
WTF is The Ultimate Riddle? (pgs. 1903)
Who the fuck are the blind prophets? (pg. 2031)
Why are there two sets of ruins on Alternia? The whole red and blue team thing was never real!
What’s the deal with the doomsday device? (pg. 2131)
Why did Snowman tell Terezi to exile Jack Noir? (pg. 2532)
Why did Dream John blink out of existence instead of just falling asleep when Vriska woke him? (pg. 2647)
How did Rose know how to contact Doc Scratch?
Who is the "master" that Aradia and Dave serve? (pg. 3489)
How did A2 Slick get the eyepatch and robot arm seen during the Doc Scratch segment? (pg. 3617)
What is Jack's Real Name? What is Scratch's Real Name? (pg. 3620)
Why do the ruins seen on pg. 2283 look so similar to the ones Darkleer was hiding in on pg. 3755?
DS says he told Rose to not look into the orb (pg. 3786), but both pg. 3632 and pg. 3638 contradict this. Was that not him?
How did Jade know about the yellow yard? (pg. 3871)
How does John know that? (pg. 3952)
What's with fedorafreak? (pgs. 3954–3956) Is he from Universe B1? If so, why are there 4 heroes and not 5?
What did Kanaya's Denizen ask her to do? (pg. 3979)
Why does that frog look like a rainbow drinker? (pg. 3980)
Doc Scratch left the blue arrows out for Hussie, so he knew he was coming. Why didn't he do anything?
Why is Doc Scratch a lifeless puppet when Hussie's around? (pg. 4077)
How the fuck did Gamzee get the Warhammer of Zillyhoo? He doesn't even use hammers, he uses clubs!!! (pgs. 3679+4085)
Why does Hussie need the characters to go through the yellow yard?
Why does Snowman have blue blood, while the other Dersites have red? (pg. 4110)
Shouldn't Jade still be able to teleport things with her space powers, even if she can't with her Bec powers? (pg. 4304)
What's going on on pgs. 4306 & 4307?
Origins of God Cat? How was he created?
Why does footage of B2 Rose black out? (pg. 4513)
How can Dirk be both his earth self and his dream self at the same time?
Where the hell is Calliope getting all of this info about sessions from? She only has the book from the B1 Session!
Why does Dirk get deja vu about uu? (pg. 4650)
Why does CD blow up the Black and White Kings? (pgs. 4703 & 4704)
(Possible Continuity Error?) How did Hussie pull out the wand after tossing the magnum? (pg. 4804/4807)
Why did A2 Gl'bgolyb keep killing all the trolls? (pg. 4849)
In conjunction with the previous, isn't Gl'bgolyb dead???????? Feferi says as such on pgs. 2850 & 2991. Are there two Gl'bgolybs????
Why is Jade blonde? (pg. 4855)
What powers did limebloods have? (pg. 4962)
Who "Commissioned" Bec Noir to destroy all B universes? LE? Is he afraid? (pg. 5072)
How does Calliope have Doc Scratch's gun/holster/wand? (pg. 5112)
How does Dirk know that Jake beat up Meenah? (pg. 5215) That wasn't actually him, no?
How did Mituna burn himself out?
Why did A1 Damara go all crazy?
How did John take The Ring Of Life with him from the dream bubble?
What's the deal with Caliborn's terminal? Why is it there?
Who moved Earth, and how did they move it? (pg. 5496)
When/Why did Caliborn get put in Derse jail? (pg. 5554)
Why is 154 a big deal for Derse? (pg. 5560)
What is going on on pgs. 5808/5809 with Lil Cal?
How/When did Caliborn get all buff?
Why did 3 of Caliborn's planets fall into the black hole? And why 6, 7, and 11 specifically? (pg. 6001)
Where did the Ring of Life come from? (pg. 6034)
Why did Kurloz take Vriska's pirate coat? (pg. 6066)
Why does Meenah think she's going to steal the Ring of Life from John? (pgs. 6067–6072) Like, The Condesce wears a lot of jewelry, but distinctly does not wear a ring, so, what gives? Is it just because she's a Thief of Life?
How can Vriska know what the narrator is doing? (pgs. 6076/6080)
How does Vriska even know that Hussie ('Orange Guy') is The Narrator?
How can Vriska control Hussie? Her powers don't work on humans, right? And Hussie is human, as he describes humans with "we" (pg. 6080)
Where/When is Hussie writing all of this from? Is it like authorspace or something? Maybe time flows narratively there??? ????????
Why did LE leave his gun/staff behind? (pg. 6116)
How did Caliborn turn his black gun/staff gold?
Why is The Cueball necessary to create a weapon capable of harming Lord English? (pg. 6322)
How do Meenah and Aranea know what the 'legit chain of events' consists of? (pg. 6553)
Why must Dave be the one to deal the final blow to Lord English? (pg. 6383) [Also as seen in The Epilogues, he's not the one to kill him! That's AltCalliope!]
How can Aranea know where Roxy was? (pg. 6662)
Why is the stage there? If it's not from Jade's or Calliope's memories, so it shouldn't be there, no? (pg. 6677/6717)
How the hell is Aranea using telekinesis on pgs. 6845 & 6901?????
Why is Lil Seb gesturing no on pg. 6898? John is correct, right?
Why do dead cherubs have black eyes while dead humans & trolls have white?
Why did John & Roxy make that choice? Seems kinda selfish no? Isn't this supposed to be a heroic thing they're doing? (pg. 7104)
How can the events of A6A5A5 take place before Caliborn gets buff when those events involve Dirk stealing his soul? How can Caliborn possibly survive that?
Can just anyone time travel? We see Vriska on pg. 7449 with Aradia's timetables, implying she used them, despite not being a time hero. We also see Gamzee do the same. What even is the point of being a time hero lol?
How the hell does Vriska know so much?!?!?!?!
How does Lord Jack exist in the post-retcon timeline without Gamzee to send Cal to Derse jail?
Why can't The Condesce mind control Vriska? (pg. 7520) Why is she resistant? She's from a lower blood caste.
Why doesn't AltCalliope have wings like the cherub on pg. 5962? (pg. 7601) She matured properly, no? (pg. 5973)
What is AltCalliope's promise to Echidna? (pg. 7616)
(Possible Continuity Error?) Dirk turning his back and Equius getting prototyped only happened pre-retcon. Vriska told him it would happen. (pgs. 7674 & 7449)
"KANAYA: There Were Twelve Of Us Back Then
ROXY: yeah WOW!!!
ROXY: i remember hearing about that from a friend
ROXY: who...
ROXY: never even existed from this frame of reference :(" ???????
Who tf is she talking about??? (pg. 7779)
Why are there two Nannasprites? (pg. 7806)
Why does Jasprosesprite^2 think that Nepeta has been "toyed with and disrespected by none other than the supreme puppeteer of unrepentant horseshit himself." and who is she talking about? (pg. 7816)
What the hell is up with Aranea in the post-retcon timeline. Where is she? Did she just cease to exist? Doubtful.
Why does Davepetasprite^2 suddenly want to fight Lord English? Why would he be "vulnerable" to them?
How did all the guardians know what was going to happen? (pg. 7919, as well as many other places)
What exactly is going on in [S] Terezi: Remem8er.?
How was PM able to resist/attack Jade? Why couldn't Jack do the same? (pg. 8087)
How did Dave break Dirk's unbreakable katana? It's explicitly unbreakable. (pg. 8087)
Why/How the fuck does Nannasprite have the ability to revive people???? (pg. 8089)
What happens to the versions of the alpha kids that fight Lord English?
How does John going back to defeat Lord English "authenticate" the Meat timeline? Shouldn't John's retconning just make The Meat Timeline cease to exist? His meddling means that Earth C was never created (because everyone dies), which is fine, because his version of time travel doesn't need to make stable loops, but I don't see how him doing that would authenticate anything in the Meat timeline?
Where are the commands coming from in the Epilogues?
When/How did The Mayor die? (Meat, pg. 2)
Can trolls not handle any sunlight at all, or is the Alternian sun particularly strong? Like, does Karkat avoid the Earth C sun because he'll literally burn up, or just because he’s Karkat and doesn't like outside?
Why does Dirk want Jane to win the election? He’s not xenophobic. How does it serve his interests? What are his interests anyways? He talks about Jane ruling for millions of years on Meat pg. 39. Why?
How did Dirk gain the ability to become a narrator? Hussie had a terminal of sorts [I think?], but Dirk can narrate while taking actions. And the ability to narrate clearly isn't inherent to those who have ascended to their Ultimate Selves. (See: Davebot/Rosebot)
Same as above but for AltCalliope.
How do Meenah and Calliope both simultaneously have the Ring of Life in the Meat timeline? Isn't it a juju, and thus unable to be duplicated through time shenanigans?
When/How did Dirk become Ultimate Dirk? At what point did he start influencing The Narrative? Why?
Same as above but for AltCalliope.
Why does Calliope tell John to free Gamzee in the Candy timeline?
Who is narrating in black in the Candy timeline?
Why the fuck does Jade say that Dave kissed Karkat? How? (Candy, pg. 9)
What did Terezi say to Candy John? (end of Candy, pg. 10)
Why/How the fuck is Gamzee in Dirk's studio? (Candy, pg. 13)
"When you think so little of yourself as a moral character, any act of self-termination will result in a death that is Just." ???????? He's not the one making the judgement???????? Why should it matter what he thinks about himself???????? (Candy, pg. 14)
Why does Dave say that the teen Jade corpse is from "seven or eight years ago" when it's actually more like 11? (Candy, pg. 20)
Why do only some people act super weird in the Candy timeline? Karkat and John still remain themselves, while Roxy becomes completely lobotomized, and others only seem mildly changed? And why is it only for a brief moment? Does it have to do with John’s emotional state at any given time? Vriska seems to imply as much on Candy pg. 38. Or perhaps Roxy is right and they didn’t actually change that much at all? I honestly have no idea what's going on with all of that.
How did AltCalliope possess Teen Jade's body?
Why is the Candy timeline free from Dirk's influence? He clearly has the ability to be present in other timelines (see: Pesterquest)
Why does the server that Meenah absconds into take her to Candy Earth C?
Why does Vrissy say she's "8asically Immortal?" Is she a god-tier? Or just extremely overconfident? (Candy, pg. 34)
(Nitpick) When did John ever get any experience with washing troll blood out of clothes? (Candy, pg. 36)
Why do John's retcon powers stop working in the Candy timeline? He's unburdened by Canon, no?
What did Vriska say to Terezi on Candy pg. 37?
Did Dirk set up the White House transportalizer and Obama hologram? When? Why? How did he know Dave would find it? If it is actually Obama, why does he act so strange? His words and actions are completely in line with the goals of Dirk. If it is actually Dirk puppeting it, how is he doing so? How is he channeling the actual power of Hope while he is a hero of Heart?
Why does Dave see a great dark cloud as he's ascending? And why does he see Dirk for a moment? (Candy, pg. 39)
Can Davebot or Rosebot die normal deaths? Or does the Heroic/Just immortality of their God forms continue even after their biological death?
Why does Davebot ask AltCalliope "DAVEBOT: so we doin this" When did they plan together? (Meat postscript)
What does it really mean to ascend, to become your Ultimate self?
Why does Dirk say that Rose belongs to him after she ascends? (Meat, pg. 25)
Why can AltCalliope overpower Dirk narratively?
How does Dirk "close his mind to all observation" (Meat, pg. 29)?Does closing it to observation also mean closing it to influence?
"You may be able to suppress what I do with my mind, but you have no control over my mouth." (Meat, pg. 32) Why? Can narrators not control dialogue in general, or is Dirk a special case?
(Possible Continuity Error) How is there shaving cream in the wallet when CD used it all to explode Jade back in A5A2? Also why is the wallet even there? Didn't John lose it? He says as much during his retconning back in A6, right?
Why does Terezi only notice Dirk's narration after she goes to Earth C? He was narrating when she was near the Black Hole w/ John as well.
Is Terezi's awareness of the narration due to her status as a Hero of Mind, or because she was in Canon for so long? Or perhaps a secret third thing?
Why does Calliope start scribbling things about the Candy timeline on the walls? (Meat, pg. 36)
How could Meat John possibly be resuscitated? He didn’t just die, he was erased.
Why doesn't Vriska have a gash on her head + a piece of space lodged in her chest? And where'd she get that eyepatch? (BC, pg. 66)
Why is Jane so pissed about Gamzee on BC pg. 90 when she messily broke up with him literally a few hours ago?
What on earth is the ending of A Treatise on Representational Democracy, pg. 13 saying?
"DIRK: You came to this planet. You saw it in your mind's eye and chose to come here.
More or less." (BC, pg. 130) ???????? What the fuck is Dirk talking about?
Why does Rose's body need to be kept alive to transfer her consciousness to Rosebot, while Dave's body does not need to be alive to transfer his consciousness to Davebot?
Is that the fucking Ring of Life on Hysterical Broad's hand?????? (Catnapped, pg. 24)
Who is narrating in black on BC pg. 144? It's clearly not Dirk, and it's also clearly not AltCalliope. Is it Hussie somehow? Is it MSPAR? Is it The Director? Does there have to be an in-story narrator in order for narration to exist?
Why is Dirk afraid of Yiffy? (A Threat Sensed)
Why does Vrissy suddenly fall asleep on BC pg. 261?
Why are Davebot's shades red on BC pg. 278 when it's explicitly stated that he took his shades off of his own corpse in the epilogues?
When/How did Aradia ascend?
Why isn't Vriska mentioned much in the history books? Are they somehow from the pre-retcon timeline or something? (pg. 328)
Why/How can Dirk and Aradia be ascended without their bodies giving out?
Why isn't Rosebot aware of the narration?
Why did John deciding not to go fight LE put Candy Earth C inside the Black Hole?
How did AltCalliope, Davebot, and Aradia get their ship? It didn't come with them through the wormhole.
Why is the "THANKS FOR PLAYING" in the sky fading? (BC pg. 496)
What the hell happened between BC pgs. 523 and 526?
What sticker is Harry Anderson referring to on BC pg. 546?
Why do Vrissy's mind control powers work on humans?
What's going on on BC pg. 553?
Where are the new dream bubbles coming from? (BC pg. 589)
Do Dirk's Bullshit Powers have limits? Or is he just straight up omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent.
Why is the first bit of narration on BC pg. 611 in black instead of orange? Same for 612.
Who are the "friends in high places" that AltCalliope refers to on BC pg. 658?
Are the commands in HSBC coming from Dirk? BC pg. 714 would seem to indicate so, but Dirk doesn't have access to the candy timeline.
WTF is this PM-looking robot at ~1:38 on BC pg. 716
What the FUCK is going on on BC pg. 719??? Who's that girl?
How does Candy John know that Dirk is the enemy? (BC pg. 742)
Is (normal, not alt) Calliope a narrator? (BC pg. 758)
What exactly is happening on BC pg. 767? Is Vriska destroying the letters (if so, why?) or just taking them? (also if so, why?)
How the hell are Jane and Jake on the ship w/ The Meat Gang? Did Vriska just yoink them from Midnight city and put them there? If so, why doesn't Karkat react more strongly to their presence? He acts like it's no big deal. Were they "already there," so to speak? How? Why did Vriska put them there?
What does it mean to be cursed? (BC pg. 802)
How did Hussie learn everything and gain all knowledge of what will happen? Clearly this isn’t something inherent to narrators.
8ut you already knew that, right?
What’s with the weird sun and red sky near Dave's place? (pg. 444)
I think Texas is just like that ;p
Spades Slick is a butch lesbian 2k25
yeah what libraryseraph said (texan approved )
When/How did Aradia ascend?
In [S] Wake, she had a dreamself on a godtier slab when Derse is destroyed Bec Noir.
What is Jack's Real Name? What is Scratch's Real Name? (pg. 3620)
Jack's real name is exactly that, Jack Noir. Scratch is referring to the fact that he's going by Spades Slick now. And when he's talking about his own name, he's referring to the fact that he is actually a vessel for Lord English.
Why does Jasprosesprite^2 think that Nepeta has been "toyed with and disrespected by none other than the supreme puppeteer of unrepentant horseshit himself." and who is she talking about? (pg. 7816)
I always took it to mean Lord English, through his composite parts Equius and Gamzee. Remember that it was Equius who failed to stop Gamzee, and then Gamzee who killed her.
>How long is Karkat’s lifespan? He's not on the hemospectrum at all, so...
We actually have no clue and the comic never actually says how long Mutants can live lol. Though they do say Mutants don't live for very long, that's not because of their natural lifespan, but more so because of the Alternian drones that cull weaker blood types. So technically Karkat could live for a pretty long time, but I think he just has the same lifespan as an average human lol.
>What is Jack's Real Name? What is Scratch's Real Name?
Jack's real name is "Spades Slick". We don't know Doc Scratch's "real name" but I always thought he was just lying and that he either has no name at all since he's just a vessel for Lord English or his name really is just Doc Scratch and he's a liar lol.
>What is the Ultimate Riddle?
When Karkat and John have a conversation here about the "Ultimate Riddle" they're basically discussing a "what came first, the chicken or the egg?" kind of riddle. Karkat is saying that the game, Sburb, lays out a bunch of clues and puzzles for the players to solve that eventually lead them to the Ectobiology lab to create themselves, and that it's supposed to reveal the cyclical nature of the game itself, how there was never an escape from playing because you were always destined to play this game since you are the only reason you even exist in the first place.
>Can trolls not handle any sunlight at all, or is the Alternian sun particularly strong? Like, does Karkat avoid the Earth C sun because he'll literally burn up, or just because he’s Karkat and doesn't like outside?
In the game Friendsim, we actually learn that the Alternian sun is incredibly strong and that it literally scorches the skin off of Trolls who stay out too long. Trolls keep their Hives dark on purpose because direct sunlight kind of hurts their eyes. In the Epilogues, Dave mentions that they always keep the "Hive" (or House) dark because Karkat doesn't like having all of the lights on, unlike humans. So yes, Trolls don't really like sunlight. There's also just the added fact that the "sun" isn't "his sun" as in it's not the Alternian sun he's used to. Weirdly, he is also a bit homesick </3
>Why does Dirk get deja vu about uu? (I'm gonna try to answer this one as best I can lol)
Prince of Heart stuff. He's not actually getting Deja Vu here from a previous conversation but rather it's complicated weird "Splinter" stuff. This is a reference to the scene in the first few acts when Dave and his Bro fight on the roof. This Dirk isn't the same as Bro Strider, but he's still "A Dirk". When he says he has Deja Vu, he's talking about that other Splinter of himself, Bro Strider. He feels like he had that conversation before. He technically did, just not in this universe.
>Who is the "master" that Aradia and Dave serve?
In context Aradia is referring to the existence of doomed timelines, and the fact that they, as time players, have a better understanding of said doomed timelines and the consequence of said doomed timelines (i.e.: death). At that point of the story, it's likely the reader will assume that when Aradia says "master" she's speaking more so metaphorically (Dave refers to a undefined "time god" in the next line), as doomed timelines are understood as just a reality of paradox space or whatever at that point. However, in retrospect, we can assume the master in question is Caliborn/Lord English, as he is the lord of time and it is implied/speculated the concept of the alpha timeline exists specifically because the alpha timeline is the one that facilitates his birth (Calliope states that a part of his role as the lord of time is the fact that things just work out for him).
>What's with fedorafreak? (pgs. 3954–3956) Is he from Universe B1? If so, why are there 4 heroes and not 5?
There are a ton of different sburb sessions happening at the same time (in the page where Rose looks at the map of the meteors, sorry can't find the exact page rn, you see that there are a ton of active sburb sessions and meteors are hitting specific places where people are trying to enter), it's just that seemingly the beta kids' session is the only one to succeed. This makes sense since sburb is a regular released game in Universe B1, and also mirrors the idea of sburb being a reproduction system for universes: there are a lot of attempts, but only some of them are fertile.
>What is AltCalliope's promise to Echidna? (pg. 7616)
The choice the denizen places upon a person in a one-person session is to either become a conqueror (Caliborn chooses this) or a martyr (Calliope chooses this). When this choice is introduced, it is also said that someone who chooses martyrdom will likely use the power granted by their denizen to later down the line defeat/stop someone who chose conquest, so most likely her promise was to defeat/stop Caliborn, which she goes on to do with the black hole.
>Why can't The Condesce mind control Vriska? (pg. 7520) Why is she resistant? She's from a lower blood caste.
It's not actually stated that mind control works on "lower castes", but rather the "impressionable" (pg 2178). I'm pretty sure Vriska can't mind control Aradia, for example. The point here being that it doesn't depend on caste, but mental fortitude. This is also why Vriska can only control Sollux half the time - since he's bipolar, he's only susceptible to it during his episodes.
>What exactly is going on in [S] Terezi: Remem8er.?
Terezi is remembering! Lol, but actually: we are shown several things. Firstly, Terezi reminiscing on her childhood with Vriska. Secondly, we are shown all the instances of ghosts waking up after their deaths in the dream bubbles. Thirdly, we are shown Terezi from the game over timeline and (Vriska) using dream bubbles to find each other and reunite. Since dream bubbles work on memories, it's my read (and I'm pretty sure it's what was meant to be conveyed) that both doomed Terezi and (Vriska) are remembering their times together, which results in their paths through the dream bubbles converging and they find each other.
>How was PM able to resist/attack Jade? Why couldn't Jack do the same? (pg. 8087)
It's pretty much implied that they don't have the resistance to actually "hurt" Jade, they just can't kill her/meaningfully harm her because of the Bec influence. PM just punches Jade to temporarily knock her out (and since she's a god at this point the attack doesn't meaningfully hurt her). In terms of character motivations, I think the reason Jack couldn't do the same is because Jack is a murderous asshole who's entire motivation is blind murder, especially since by that point Bec Noir has murdered universes for basically no reason. PM, on the other hand, doesn't want to murder anyone, just stop Jack, which is why she's capable of making a momentary pragmatic decision to non-lethally incapacitate Jade, something Jack cannot do because he's basically permanently running on murderous intent.
>Why is Jade blonde? (pg. 4855)
She's an old woman so her hair went grey/white.
>Why does Snowman have blue blood, while the other Dersites have red? (pg. 4110)
Because she's tied to the troll's universe (as in, she literally has that entire universe inside her), which is represented by blue in [S] Cascade. So she's literally bleeding out the universe.
>"When you think so little of yourself as a moral character, any act of self-termination will result in a death that is Just." ???????? He's not the one making the judgement???????? Why should it matter what he thinks about himself???????? (Candy, pg. 14)
This one's a bit complicated but my personal interpretation is the idea of the fact that he is both the killer and the victim - and he chooses to kill himself in the most public, gruesome way possible. The passages before this describe just how gruesome his suicide was, so I think the idea here is that he's so unconcerned with his life and the way that it affects others that his suicide is "justice" for him. as opposed to continue to exist as a person in this world despite him thinking that literally nothing matters anymore as far as his existence is concerned makes his suicide just. Of course this comes with the caveat that the whole godtier judgement thing is muddled on purpose in the first place, and that the whole idea of "just" is more complicated than it seems on first glance. But yeah I think the idea here is that if he thinks there's literally nothing that matters in regards to him existing within this narrative, the narrative considers it just for him to take himself out of it.
>Why do John's retcon powers stop working in the Candy timeline? He's unburdened by Canon, no?
I think the idea here is that the concept of a "retcon" only even works as far as you're working with a canon to begin with. Like, when we look at what a "retcon" is in terms of definition, it is going back on something said previously and stating contradicting information, basically changing the canon. So if you're outside of canon, there's nothing to change. He tethered himself completely from what needs to be done in order to continue staying within canon (in this context: completing the Caliborn/Lord English timeloop), so he loses his ability to interact with canon (which is what the retcon powers do).
>How the hell are Jane and Jake on the ship w/ The Meat Gang? Did Vriska just yoink them from Midnight city and put them there? If so, why doesn't Karkat react more strongly to their presence? He acts like it's no big deal. Were they "already there," so to speak? How? Why did Vriska put them there?
It's heavily implied and currently speculated that Vriska has gained some sort of retcon powers (highlighted by the dialogue right before this happens). Meaning, Jane and Jake being there is a retcon, hence why Karkat reacts like it's normal.
I've been watching these forums for a while now, but having a bunch of obscure questions to answer gave me the motivation to finally join and show off how much of a nerd I am. So, thank you! Anyway, let's see how many of these I can answer and haven't already been answered:
Why/How does the universe end if Snowman dies?
Doc Scratch gave her those powers, somehow, as part of his preparations for English's entry. (2311, 2555)
How the hell does John know what trolls look like? (pg. 1714)
Terezi included an image of herself in the map of LOWAS she sent. (1685)
Why are there two sets of ruins on Alternia? The whole red and blue team thing was never real!
Yes, but it's a special "bifurcated session" that's meant to look like two separate sessions. Why this is is unclear, but it could be representative of the fact that the kid and troll sessions, too, appeared independent, but were, in fact, intertwined.
What’s the deal with the doomsday device? (pg. 2131)
Thanks to Scratch and the Handmaid, apocalypses are a big cultural thing on Alternia. In the books' author commentary, Hussie implies that since a dragon egg is involved in the device, Redglare may have put it there.
Why did Snowman tell Terezi to exile Jack Noir? (pg. 2532)
As revenge for Jack exiling her. (2555)
Why did Dream John blink out of existence instead of just falling asleep when Vriska woke him? (pg. 2647)
Dunno, but he also disappears when he wakes up on page 2951, and they're both similar to Vriska's disappearance on page 3129 when she's transported to her dream quest bed on the Battlefield. Maybe if you fall asleep in midair, Skaia transports you somewhere safe?
How did Rose know how to contact Doc Scratch?
Maybe the horrorterrors told her? Sollux was able to figure out how to contact him, after all, (2256) so there is a way.
Why do the ruins seen on pg. 2283 look so similar to the ones Darkleer was hiding in on pg. 3755?
I mean, it is his descendant's land. There's probably some deeper reason, though, idk.
DS says he told Rose to not look into the orb (pg. 3786), but both pg. 3632 and pg. 3638 contradict this. Was that not him?
I guess this counts as a """warning""": "Would it be so difficult to believe a young lady could be unwittingly apprenticed by more powerful entities who meant her potential to be realized later through some arbitrary trigger? ... What would you say if I said a reserved girl enamored by what dwelt in shadow was selected by the horrorterrors for service, and did their bidding at every step while convinced of her own autonomy?" (3632) And Scratch is all about the technicalities.
How did Jade know about the yellow yard? (pg. 3871)
It's mentioned in Prospitian prophecies. "Though we adore Him we shall never enjoy His beauteous Croak. We spill our blood on acres of black and white so they may cross the yellow yard. At last in Skaia's reflection through broken glass He may find the pond in which He's meant to squat." (3695)
How does John know that? (pg. 3952)
Typheus told him, probably. (3953)
Why does that frog look like a rainbow drinker? (pg. 3980)
I think it's just glowy, since it's a big part of the god frog and all. What seems relevant to me is its eyes glowing in the beta kids' colors. (This is, imo, one of the biggest loose ends in Homestuck.)
Doc Scratch left the blue arrows out for Hussie, so he knew he was coming. Why didn't he do anything?
The arrows are for the reader, though, I think. Even if he did know, though, he already accomplished all of his goals.
Why is Doc Scratch a lifeless puppet when Hussie's around? (pg. 4077)
This is tough to concisely answer, but TLDR, Scratch is sort of an alternate author figure. And there can't be two authors in one place, I guess???? Hussie goes way more in depth about this in the book commentary.
How the fuck did Gamzee get the Warhammer of Zillyhoo? He doesn't even use hammers, he uses clubs!!! (pgs. 3679+4085)
By being a zilly clown, obviously. And he also has a jokerkind specibus. (3452)
Why does Hussie need the characters to go through the yellow yard?
Not quite sure what you mean by this?
Anyway, I think that's enough for one post. I'll cover some of the Act 6 questions later.
re:elegantSpinstress
">Why does Dirk get deja vu about uu? (I'm gonna try to answer this one as best I can lol)
Prince of Heart stuff. He's not actually getting Deja Vu here from a previous conversation but rather it's complicated weird "Splinter" stuff. This is a reference to the scene in the first few acts when Dave and his Bro fight on the roof. This Dirk isn't the same as Bro Strider, but he's still "A Dirk". When he says he has Deja Vu, he's talking about that other Splinter of himself, Bro Strider. He feels like he had that conversation before. He technically did, just not in this universe."
That makes sense for the second instance of deja vu
"uu: "HELLO DIRK."
uu: "I WANT TO PLAY A GAME."
uu: AND THEN LIKE.
uu: "BRO."
uu: "ROOF. NOW."
uu: "BRING JuJu."
uu: AND THAT'S IT.
uu: YEAH. THAT WOuLD HAVE BEEN GOOD.
uu: COLD FuCKING BLOODED. TO THE POINT. DAMMIT.
TT: That actually sounds familiar too.
TT: Are you sure you haven't said something like that before?"
but it doesn't make sense for the first
"uu: IT'S NOT THAT I DON'T MIND. IT'S THAT I FAIL SPECTACuLARLY TO GIVE A SHIT.
uu: THERE IS SuCH A BIG DIFFERENCE.
uu: AND THE FACT THAT I MIGHT NOT CLuE YOu INTO YOuR FATE ALL THE TIME.
uu: DuE TO MY AGGRAVATED APATHY OVER THE MATTER.
uu: IS AN IMMuTABLE FACT. I AM STATING FOR THE RECORD.
uu: IT DOES NOT MEAN THAT GIVING A SHIT IS WHAT IS TAKING PLACE HERE.
TT: I feel like you've said something like that before.
TT: Different statements, but in that exact syntax."
This syntax that Caliborn is using is used only by Karkat, and, sarcastically, Kanaya. Neither of these conversations where they use this syntax are with Dirk. They're with John and Aradia respectively, who I can't see any arguments for being splinters of Dirk.
8ut you already knew that, right?
re:molemarian
By 'ascend' I meant "ascent to her Ultimate Self", not "ascend to god-tier" :P
8ut you already knew that, right?
re:finesilvercloud
"Why does Hussie need the characters to go through the yellow yard?
Not quite sure what you mean by this?"
I probably should've replaced the word 'need' there with 'want.' What I'm asking is why did he intervene and do that?
8ut you already knew that, right?
RE:yellow yard
Some carapacians saw it in a cloud, so it was always going to happen. Hussie the character wants them to cross the yellow yard for the same reason Hussie the author of Homestuck wanted them to, to fulfill a piece of foreshadowing.
Why did Snowman tell Terezi to exile Jack Noir? (pg. 2532)
I'd like to give a different answer than what's been provided. I mean, maybe she would have done that anyway for that reason, hypothetically. The actual reason she did it was to fulfill a time paradox, because of course she's already working for Doc Scratch at this point. If Snowman didn't step in and instruct Terezi, Jack's original plan of taking BQ's ring for himself would have doomed the trolls' session. More importantly, if Jack Noir isn't exiled, Spades Slick doesn't kill Snowman.
How was PM able to resist/attack Jade? Why couldn't Jack do the same? (pg. 8087)
I'll add onto Danya's point by mentioning that by Collide, Jack has already gone through his "killing people is boring" phase, and his "I'm really sick of running from this chick" phase. I think that small section he has in the dreambubble, reliving the events of seer: descend is the closest he ever gets to character growth. Not EXACTLY regret, but more like... futility? Which is something of a theme for the carapacians. It's not just that PM has a stronger motivation, but that as early as act 5 Jack's motivation has already begun to wane, and by the time he faces off against PM I doubt he wants to go on any murder rampages at all.
What is Jack's Real Name?
I mean its just Jack, right? If you mean his alliterative "SS" title, as per the default parameters of Sburb, then we just don't know lol. Maybe... Sepulchral Statesman?
Who "Commissioned" Bec Noir to destroy all B universes? LE? Is he afraid? (pg. 5072)
Yes, it was Lord English exactly. I think LE just believes its poetic for Jack to execute his plans, since that's how he originally won against Calliope. This is why B2 Jack gets possessed by English, Caliborn just likes him.
How does Calliope have Doc Scratch's gun/holster/wand?
I think its more accurate to say that Doc Scratch has Calliope's gun/holster/wand. Its a trophy that Caliborn keeps, which is why Lord English immediately reclaims it after killing Hussie (cosplaying as Calliope's OC).
Why does CD blow up the Black and White Kings? (pgs. 4703 & 4704)
To subvert the mechanics of Sburb and give Condy more control over the session
(Possible Continuity Error?) How did Hussie pull out the wand after tossing the magnum? (pg. 4804/4807)
I can't go back and check, but it might just be Eridan's wand. That, or the idea of the magnum and wand being one in the same was a retcon. I don't believe it ever transforms between the two before Calliope is introduced
Where did the Ring of Life come from? (pg. 6034)
The white queen. The ring of life and void are just WQ and BQ's rings before being prototyped.
Why did Kurloz take Vriska's pirate coat? (pg. 6066)
I think it was a setup to establish how the cairo overcoat was created, but its never followed up on
Why did LE leave his gun/staff behind? (pg. 6116)
He doesn't really need it. He can kill way more people at the same time just using clockwork majyyks, plus he replaces it with the wand
How did Caliborn turn his black gun/staff gold?
Alchemy probably
Why is The Cueball necessary to create a weapon capable of harming Lord English? (pg. 6322)
Something something hoisted by his own petard. In all seriousness, it may just be part of his bargain with yaldabaoth
Why is Dirk's opinion of himself relevant to his Heroic/Just judgement?
The god tier clock is weighing in on the outcome of a narrative, and both Dirk and his murderer are author figures. In the conversation towards the end between Al and Aradia, Al demonstrates the idea of influencing the minds of the characters on the "chessboard" by using the specific text of the narration to frame events that happen anyway in specific ways, without actually taking control personally, using a martyr died and said fuck as an example. Since this action operates on the meta layer, it is conceivable that Al specifically going out of their way to narrate the judgement in this way directly guarantees Dirk's god tier clock will swing to Just.
re:ruki
I'd never thought of it that way. That's actually really cool! It does have a rather glaring flaw, though, that being that Dirk's narrative control is severed at the beginning of Candy, so he can't be affecting the narrative like that during that moment.
I do think, however, that this could be the explanation behind Lord English's unconditional immortality. As an author-tier entity himself, it's safe to assume that he has similar narrative powers (though his are largely subconscious due to his particular class.) Him destroying his god tier clock in the A7 flash would be a very apt visual interpretation of him exerting his control over that particular narrative device, making it so that it will never rule a death of his neither Heroic nor Just. A control which could only be severed by someone of equal or greater narrative power, like AltCalliope, who, of course, is the one who ends up killing him.
I like this idea a lot.
8ut you already knew that, right?
re:vriskasimp
I think ruki's point is that it's Al making that judgement, not Dirk, so Dirk doesn't need to affect the narrative in that moment. But I'm not actually sure that Dirk's narrative control is completely severed at the start of Candy. It could be that he just doesn't want to preside over the non-canon world that he finds himself trapped in, and he wants to give one last piece of meaning to the world by declaring his death just.
re:bodertz
1: It's definitely not AltCalliope, as Jade hasn't fallen through the black hole yet and been possessed.
2: It's pretty clear that Dirk isn't in narrative control at that point, if for no other reason than simply because he's the "you" at that moment.
8ut you already knew that, right?
Hmm, I'm not sure that AltCalliope needs to possess Jade to have narrative control, at least to some extent. She is the black hole itself, and it seems reasonable to me that she could have some control over it for that reason alone. Even if she does need Jade, she's able to exert some influence without having possessed her: in Meat Epilogue Four, she's able to fight against Dirk's narration to influence Jade to fall into the black hole. Once she does, she's able to possess the teen Jade, and that allows her to also possess Meat Jade, giving her control over Meat as well.
In general, though, I think AltCalliope has always been the "author" of Candy, and that her reason to possess Jade was not to gain control over Candy, but rather to gain the ability to fight against Dirk, both by narrating Meat and attempting to stop his plans, and also by using her new physical body to confront him. And also eat Lord English. As Alt-Calliope says, the work will not be finished until she is able to "deal with the prince" herself.
re: WHAT'S WITH THE WEIRD RED SUN OVER DAVE'S APARTMENT
Imo it's goetse. Like big red asshole in the sky. Hussie finds people being startled by pornography amusing, be if Clover catching a glimpse of DD's nudie rag or the little elf in Jailbreak catching a glimpse of a penis from some gay porn and beginning to cry. Dave having a big red asshole in the sky reinforces the general state of having gay porn laying around the apart and makes that bit where he rhetorically locks Terezi in his grill so she is privy to "the brown side of my burger" a really tidy meeting of her sun trauma and Dave's proclivity for ass jokes.
Incidentally, I think this is also why right after John looks at the sun with his telescope, Rose rips the toilet out of the house. Sun:asshole::eye:toilet, so John was symbolically blinded by the encounter. Thus Terezi starts talking about how she went blind after rupping Karkat's toilet out
Just gonna straight up say I could easily get shit worng
What’s with the weird sun and red sky near Dave's place? (pg. 444)
Texas is just like that in homestuck.
How the FUCK did Jade get her hands on one of Doc Scratch's Cue Balls? Doc Scratch doesn’t even exist in B1! (pg. 805)
Cue balls are a sort of "calling cards" for universes Lord English has marked for predation. Any universe that has both a cue ball and has retrieved lil cal from the void could potentially create doc scratch and thus lord english, this of course doesn't happen in the B1 universe but it still acts as a calling card.
Why/How does the universe end if Snowman dies?
There is not an exact answer and that is on purpose because the events surrounding the destruction of universe A2 are shrouded in mystery and what Doc Scratch describes as "circumstantial simultaneity". Scratch has an explanation of this on page 3810 but I can get into it more if you need me too.
How long is Karkat’s lifespan? He's not on the hemospectrum at all, so...
No clue but prolly low.
How the hell does John know what trolls look like? (pg. 1714)
John is literally just guessing and happens to be correct. As far as I can tell I can't find evidence that Terezi sent John a photo like finesilvercloud.
Why are there two sets of ruins on Alternia? The whole red and blue team thing was never real!
Its just a special part of the bifurcated session. To quote the commentary "It just doesn't seem logistically viable for many more players to play this game than that. But a twelve-player session would still ordinarily just have one set of ruins: a single frog temple with twelve surrounding planet-towers. This one is a special bifurcated session, though, as it says there. That means it has one usual set of ruins, which always end up next to the Forge. (The volcano there. All sessions start with one of those, except void sessions.) And also that the future site for one of the player's homes is nearby, like Jade, Kanaya, or Jake. But the underground Rogue Ruins site is quite anomalous to a session's starting planet. It makes sense that it's underground, hidden from view, and associated with Aradia. A planet is only supposed to have one set of ruins, so these are like the Shadow Ruins, which only conspiracy theorists whisper about."
What’s the deal with the doomsday device? (pg. 2131)
It is another example of circumstantial simultaneity. Moving on.
How did Rose know how to contact Doc Scratch?
It is implied Doc Scratch contacted her. Their messages on page 3627 imply that Scratch was usually the one to initiate conversation.
TT: I think I've been patient enough.
TT: When will I receive further instruction?
Now.
TT: So,
TT: I could have contacted you at any time?
No.
Only now.
Who is the "master" that Aradia and Dave serve? (pg. 3489)
The Lord of Time, aka Lord English. Aradia says "we have to be prepared to die a thousand deaths before our quest is complete, the master we serve demands it" which relates to how the entire narrative of homestuck is pretty much exclusively about ensuring the creation and birth of lord english. One of the primary Aradiabots we see in the dream bubble conversations surrounding this one is from the one that had both carried Lil Cal to the frog ruins as well as the one that brought the first guardian code into that timeline, allowing the creation of Doc Scratch.
What is Jack's Real Name? What is Scratch's Real Name? (pg. 3620)
All of Jack's adversaries know him as "Spades Slick" so his real name is Jack. Scratches real name is Lord English.
Why do the ruins seen on pg. 2283 look so similar to the ones Darkleer was hiding in on pg. 3755?
Probably just thematic links.
How does John know that? (pg. 3952)
I am not sure exactly what you are asking, but it is very likely whatever information he gained was from his talk with Typheus.
What's with fedorafreak? (pgs. 3954–3956) Is he from Universe B1? If so, why are there 4 heroes and not 5?
FedoraFreak is in his own session. While we only follow one session in universe B1 other sessions also occurred including Obamas.
Why is Doc Scratch a lifeless puppet when Hussie's around? (pg. 4077)
Its a play on the idea that Scratch and Hussie are the same charac
How the fuck did Gamzee get the Warhammer of Zillyhoo? He doesn't even use hammers, he uses clubs!!! (pgs. 3679+4085)
Shenanigans. But honestly I am too lazy to follow the exact timeline of the warhammer of zillyhoo but presumably he went back in time or something to give it to himself.
Why does Hussie need the characters to go through the yellow yard?
To get to the alpha session?
Why does Snowman have blue blood, while the other Dersites have red? (pg. 4110)
Likely caused by whatever deal she made with Scratch.
Shouldn't Jade still be able to teleport things with her space powers, even if she can't with her Bec powers? (pg. 4304)
We don't know if she can use her space powers to teleport, the fact that she can't should be evidence enough that her space powers alone don't let her teleport.
What's going on on pgs. 4306 & 4307?
Billious Slicks dead corpse.
Origins of God Cat? How was he created?
Out of the BARK code we see Roxy has and some random cat, just because the story doesn't directly tell us what cat we can infer that it was A CAT.
Why does footage of B2 Rose black out? (pg. 4513)
She could have been in communion with the dark gods or a possible explanation is one involving the classpect shenanigans Callie talks about on that page.
How can Dirk be both his earth self and his dream self at the same time?
This is explained repeatedly, like so much but its because of his power set as a Prince Of Heart and the way his splinters operate.
Where the hell is Calliope getting all of this info about sessions from? She only has the book from the B1 Session!
Rose's big ass book.
Why does Dirk get deja vu about uu? (pg. 4650)
Something to do with the way he percieves his splinters in this case Beta Dirk.
(Possible Continuity Error?) How did Hussie pull out the wand after tossing the magnum? (pg. 4804/4807)
The wand was likely a prop imo but there are a lot of possible explanation.
Why is Jade blonde? (pg. 4855)
She has white hair, the same as how ALL the guardians hair are depicted. It has likely greyed out and thats why it isn't depicted as the usual black the harleyberts usually have.
What powers did limebloods have? (pg. 4962)
If you ask me its calliope fanfiction but otherwise we don't know.
Who "Commissioned" Bec Noir to destroy all B universes? LE? Is he afraid? (pg. 5072)
He likely indirectly "commissioned him" not literally. The destruction of universe B is required for the tumors explosion that creates the green sun which Lord English needs for both be created and a whole lot of other shit.
How does Calliope have Doc Scratch's gun/holster/wand? (pg. 5112)
Doc Scratches gun/holster/wand are likely calliopes/copies of calliopes although the other way around is also likely. With the second answer one could presume that Gamzee had given Calliope them for the express purpose of continuing the loop.
How does Dirk know that Jake beat up Meenah? (pg. 5215) That wasn't actually him, no?
When Dirks dream self falls asleep there he takes over Brain Ghost Dirk complete with also gaining his memories as evidenced by him continuing the conversation with Terezi.
How did Mituna burn himself out?
We don't know.
Why did A1 Damara go all crazy?
Constant bullying and horrible treatment by all her other players. Meenah especially was ruthless but Rufioh cheating on her among other things definitely didn't help.
How did John take The Ring Of Life with him from the dream bubble?
To establish the fact that the ring of life can be taken between dreams and "the real world" which is important because other wise Roxy wouldn't have been able to give the ring the Calliope. Im gonna be honest not to be rude but a lot of these questions fall under "This happens because the story is establishing that this is a thing that can happen"
Who moved Earth, and how did they move it? (pg. 5496)
Vriska. She explains what she did on page 7540, this earth becomes earth C at the end of the comic which is where the Cherubs are eventually born.
Why is 154 a big deal for Derse? (pg. 5560)
I am not sure how you got the idea that "154" is an important number for derse in the comic, but the actual point is that this is a big day because the Beta
What is going on on pgs. 5808/5809 with Lil Cal?
Caliborn holding Lil Cal there was just him becoming obsessed with it and also making the point that the vessel is hollow. Meanwhile on the opposite end is Jack Noir getting not just Possessed by Lil Cal but also having all the souls and power of them transferred to him.
How/When did Caliborn get all buff?
Caliborn explains
Why did 3 of Caliborn's planets fall into the black hole? And why 6, 7, and 11 specifically? (pg. 6001)
The specific numbers don't matter but its because it is a reference to the game of pool also known as billiards where often balls can end up sunk when the first shot is made (the Break shot) and those balls will remain sunk for the remainder of the game. It is just another Billiards reference in regards to lord english.
Where did the Ring of Life come from? (pg. 6034)
Hussie. For all intents and purposes, Hussie.
Why did Kurloz take Vriska's pirate coat? (pg. 6066)
It is implied that Kurloz took Vriska's pirate coat in order to create Lord English's Cairo Overcoat, the two are pretty similar in design but not in color scheme and Kurloz is another worshiper of lord english.
Why does Meenah think she's going to steal the Ring of Life from John? (pgs. 6067–6072) Like, The Condesce wears a lot of jewelry, but distinctly does not wear a ring, so, what gives? Is it just because she's a Thief of Life?
It is mostly just a joke about her title.
How can Vriska know what the narrator is doing? (pgs. 6076/6080)
Its just something some people can do especially if it conflicts with what they want, this idea is explored A LOT in the epilogues but can also be seen with stuff as early as Wayward Vagabond using the terminal to command John. There is a lot to here but I cover in more in the following questions. She also mentions on page 6082 that she can "SENSE WH8N SOME SORT OF 8ULLFUCKERY IS AFOOT" in regards to Hussie.
How does Vriska even know that Hussie ('Orange Guy') is The Narrator?
Read above but also she can prolly just recognise his voice, Terezi does something similar when she hears Dirks narration in the epilogues.
How can Vriska control Hussie? Her powers don't work on humans, right? And Hussie is human, as he describes humans with "we" (pg. 6080)
She easily just be adding her own narration, being narrator in homestuck is not a special power certain characters have, it is mostly based on awareness of the plot. This is a good post that covers the bell tower scene in the epilogues and how it relates to people being narrators. https://www.tumblr.com/dingodad/782310273277165568/is-there-any-leading-idea-on-why-specifically-ult?source=share
Where/When is Hussie writing all of this from? Is it like authorspace or something? Maybe time flows narratively there??? ????????
He can just still narrate when he is dead most likely.
Why did LE leave his gun/staff behind? (pg. 6116)
I don't think LE needs that gun, he just left it behind because he felt like it.
How did Caliborn turn his black gun/staff gold?
Alchemy presumably. If he got another sburb server copy he could just, place down the alchemy stuff himself.
Why is The Cueball necessary to create a weapon capable of harming Lord English? (pg. 6322)
Another Billiards thing.
How do Meenah and Aranea know what the 'legit chain of events' consists of? (pg. 6553)
They don't, they are just assuming that Aranea's involvement would immediately doom the timeline which it kinda does? Even though it is part of the alpha timeline since Terezi telling John how to retcon is required for the creation of lord english.
Why must Dave be the one to deal the final blow to Lord English? (pg. 6383) [Also as seen in The Epilogues, he's not the one to kill him! That's AltCalliope!]
Its just prophecy bullshit. All of homestuck is a massive timeloop so of course everything has to "go a certain way". If it doesn't go that way it splits off into a doomed timeline that dissipates. Also he does get the final blow to Lord English when he chops Lord Jacks head of and ven with proper LE he was the one to deal the final blow h, Alt!Calliope just straight up absorbs him as a pseudo predomination. I also think it is worth noting that since this takes place in candy that as far as any prophecy is concerned IT DIDNT HAPPEN. Davepeta dragging LE into the black hole was the last blow "canonically" dealt to him (in terms of the in universe idea of canonicity)
How can Aranea know where Roxy was? (pg. 6662)
She is a fully realised Sylph of light who is capable of so much bullshit. Plus she could presumably sense Roxy's emotions as she has very limited emotional perception abilities with humans.
Why is the stage there? If it's not from Jade's or Calliope's memories, so it shouldn't be there, no? (pg. 6677/6717)
The furthest ring doesn't automatically make the memories of whoever is there, it can just pull from whoever.
How the hell is Aranea using telekinesis on pgs. 6845 & 6901?????
Page 6560 shows Aranea controllinga group of Damara's throughout the furthest ring to "use" telekenises throughout the game over timeline, which why she is able to throw planets around and lift the ship.
Why is Lil Seb gesturing no on pg. 6898? John is correct, right?
I have literally zero clue but my girlfriend she thinks said its because lil seb is dirk and dirk would disagree with John about that so. (Yeah this is a complete nothing answer for the love of god someone else work this out)
Why do dead cherubs have black eyes while dead humans & trolls have white?
Just design choice.
Why did John & Roxy make that choice? Seems kinda selfish no? Isn't this supposed to be a heroic thing they're doing? (pg. 7104)
It is a selfish choices but they are also allowed to make that choice. Also John had to, he was not going to learn how to use his retcon properly.
How can the events of A6A5A5 take place before Caliborn gets buff when those events involve Dirk stealing his soul? How can Caliborn possibly survive that?
The masterpiece happens straight up after Caliborn gets UNCONDITIONAL IMMORTALITY that why he can survive everything. The unconditional immortality also presumably came with other boons including the ultimate weapon.
Can just anyone time travel? We see Vriska on pg. 7449 with Aradia's timetables, implying she used them, despite not being a time hero. We also see Gamzee do the same. What even is the point of being a time hero lol?
Yes anyone can just time travel with the right gear. Time heroes are usually the one creating the time based equipment and also their god tiers come with extra time related powers (Aradia freezing Jack Noir and Dave speeding up the localised time of Earth C before they created the new universe.
How the hell does Vriska know so much?!?!?!?!
There are so many ways she could have gained the information.
Why can't The Condesce mind control Vriska? (pg. 7520) Why is she resistant? She's from a lower blood caste.
That isn't how homestuck mind control works. The trolls who are lower caste are less resilient mainly due to societal values placed on them that tell them they are inherently weaker and less confident than higher blood castes. There is a reason why Tavros, Karkat and Sollux (half the time) are the only lower blood trolls we see vriska is able to control. Terezi, Aradia, Sollux (the other half of the time) are all immune. Mind control in homestuck is more "mental suggestion" as opposed to complete override of desire and lower castes would have been taught to be subservient to higher castes thus more easily controlled. Vriska is a character who we see able to resist something akin to the command terminal when (Vriska) interupts AH to reveal the ultimate weapon, it isn't that surprising she is immune to the Condesces mind control.
Why doesn't AltCalliope have wings like the cherub on pg. 5962? (pg. 7601) She matured properly, no? (pg. 5973)
Alt!Calliope died before she had the chance to grow up more this is presumably the reason.
What is AltCalliope's promise to Echidna? (pg. 7616)
The path of the matyr
(Possible Continuity Error?) Dirk turning his back and Equius getting prototyped only happened pre-retcon. Vriska told him it would happen. (pgs. 7674 & 7449)
Not sure if this counts as a continuity error entirely but pretty damn close.
"KANAYA: There Were Twelve Of Us Back Then
ROXY: yeah WOW!!!
ROXY: i remember hearing about that from a friend
ROXY: who...
ROXY: never even existed from this frame of reference :(" ???????
Who tf is she talking about??? (pg. 7779)
Fefetasprite who talked to Roxy A LOT offscreen, the entire gag around dear sweet precious fefeta is that we constantly hear how about how she never shut up off screen but then she never says a single line on screen.
Why are there two Nannasprites? (pg. 7806)
One of them is the pre retcon Nannasprite that came with John and Roxy when John transported Lowas, it is the same way that
Why does Jasprosesprite^2 think that Nepeta has been "toyed with and disrespected by none other than the supreme puppeteer of unrepentant horseshit himself." and who is she talking about? (pg. 7816)
This is in part a reference to how the fandom reacts to Hussie's treatment of Nepeta as if letting her pass off into obscurement is her "hating" Nepeta with how we constantly see dead nepetas. The individual Jasprosesprite^2 is talking about is presumably Lord English in particular but LE might as well the negative side of Hussie but thats a discussion for another day.
What the hell is up with Aranea in the post-retcon timeline. Where is she? Did she just cease to exist? Doubtful.
Yes she just ceased to exist for all intents and purposes.
Why does Davepetasprite^2 suddenly want to fight Lord English? Why would he be "vulnerable" to them?
A lot of questions you have about things tends to come from a lack of understanding homestucks meta narrative. Dave vs Davesprites arcs are talked about quite in depth in the authors notes but to summarise Dave journey is one of rejecting the heroes Journey which is represented by the his broken sword while Davesprites is an embrace of it like when they thought side by side with their abuser to try and kill Jack back in act 5. Davepetasprite is the ultimate culmination of this heroes journey where they go fight lord english cause they feel like it instead of out of any obligation.
How did all the guardians know what was going to happen? (pg. 7919, as well as many other places)
There are so many ways they could have gained that information especially when the condesce needed them to do certain things.
What exactly is going on in [S] Terezi: Remem8er.?
Terezi using her seer of mind powers to look at the pre retcon timeline and what happened to Game Over Terezi.
How was PM able to resist/attack Jade? Why couldn't Jack do the same? (pg. 8087)
She was just pissed enough.
How did Dave break Dirk's unbreakable katana? It's explicitly unbreakable. (pg. 8087)
There are many different explanations that all hinge of the fact that the unbreakable katana is for all intents and purposes a juju. It could have been destroyed due to its proximity to the Juju breaker that Slick was using but also due to the fact that there were two of them in existence at the same time, the one Roxy uses to kill the condesce is the version that continues on existing.
Why/How the fuck does Nannasprite have the ability to revive people???? (pg. 8089)
Jane revives them, Vriska explains this in the lilypad conversations. Nanasprite just heals the still living characters.
What happens to the versions of the alpha kids that fight Lord English?
They don't matter and might as well just be dead lol.
Just prefacing I am not answering all your epilogue and beyond canon questions, so many of these are either complete garbage or deserve their own post. aka my brain just gave up halfway through
How does John going back to defeat Lord English "authenticate" the Meat timeline? Shouldn't John's retconning just make The Meat Timeline cease to exist? His meddling means that Earth C was never created (because everyone dies), which is fine, because his version of time travel doesn't need to make stable loops, but I don't see how him doing that would authenticate anything in the Meat timeline?
He took all the characters from the pre retcon timeline which meant it didn't affect anything with the alpha timeline. JOhn needed to go fight Caliborn and initiate the masterpiece because otherwise lord english would never exist and Lord English existing is the only reason the ENTIRE STORY OF HOMESTUCK EXISTS, without that post canon would fade away as explained by Rose in the prolouge.
Where are the commands coming from in the Epilogues?
Dirk
When/How did The Mayor die? (Meat, pg. 2)
The Mayor died from old age after establishing society on earth C.
Can trolls not handle any sunlight at all, or is the Alternian sun particularly strong? Like, does Karkat avoid the Earth C sun because he'll literally burn up, or just because he’s Karkat and doesn't like outside?
The alternian sun is particularly strong and Karkat is a little bitch.
Why does Dirk want Jane to win the election? He’s not xenophobic. How does it serve his interests? What are his interests anyways? He talks about Jane ruling for millions of years on Meat pg. 39. Why?
Is he not xenophobic? Also going to preface that a lot of these epilogue answers will be speculation since the epilogues wants people to speculate, especially with the unreliable narrators. Now my personal interpretation is that Dirk knows Jane will be a shit leader and will eventually run earth C into the ground until it becomes a dead planet which would allow the cherubs egg to be layed on earth. Dirk is also a little bitch.
How did Dirk gain the ability to become a narrator? Hussie had a terminal of sorts [I think?], but Dirk can narrate while taking actions. And the ability to narrate clearly isn't inherent to those who have ascended to their Ultimate Selves. (See: Davebot/Rosebot)
To summarise Narration isn't a power, there isn't a specific reason why Doc Scratch was able to narrate homestuck, anyone with proper narrative awareness could likely be a "narrator". The reason Dirk in particular is especially able to "narrate" is due to the way he can subtly manipulate peoples thought processes ALA command terminal with his Prince of Heart powers, but that just falls under the mind control umbrella.
Read this post again https://www.tumblr.com/dingodad/782310273277165568/is-there-any-leading-idea-on-why-specifically-ult?source=share
Same as above but for AltCalliope.
Read this post again https://www.tumblr.com/dingodad/782310273277165568/is-there-any-leading-idea-on-why-specifically-ult?source=share
How do Meenah and Calliope both simultaneously have the Ring of Life in the Meat timeline? Isn't it a juju, and thus unable to be duplicated through time shenanigans?
Imo it can be duplicated through timeline shenanigans and also that it might not be a juju? Now in my girlfriends opinion there is a plot hole in how the ring is acquired (should effect the main timeline) but that doesn't stop it from being duplicated.
When/How did Dirk become Ultimate Dirk? At what point did he start influencing The Narrative? Why?
We don't know when just before the events of the epilogues but Dirk's connection to his splinters in other timelines is visible as early as act 6. The narrator shit I explained above.
Same as above but for AltCalliope.
The narrator shit I explained above.
Why does Calliope tell John to free Gamzee in the Candy timeline?
This is the action that properly splits the timeline. John retrieving Gamzee prevents Lord English's creation and thus really ensures the timeline isn't "canon". Also Calliope is Gamzee apoligist (also he is her absentee adoptive father)
Who is narrating in black in the Candy timeline?
We don't know if there is a specific narrator.
Why the fuck does Jade say that Dave kissed Karkat? How? (Candy, pg. 9)
She is trying to get Dave and Karkat to admit that they love eachother.
What did Terezi say to Candy John? (end of Candy, pg. 10)
Doesn't matter that line is to show that John really wants to talk to Terezi.
Why/How the fuck is Gamzee in Dirk's studio? (Candy, pg. 13)
Presumably to get to dirks will before anyone else can.
"When you think so little of yourself as a moral character, any act of self-termination will result in a death that is Just." ???????? He's not the one making the judgement???????? Why should it matter what he thinks about himself???????? (Candy, pg. 14)
This is evidence that what you think of yourself does influence how the god tier clock strikes lol, also he had already begun building Rosebot he has done plenty of evil stuff by this point.
Why does Dave say that the teen Jade corpse is from "seven or eight years ago" when it's actually more like 11? (Candy, pg. 20)
It is from 7 or 8 years ago, it is likely just a grimbark Jade John scooped up who stopped being controlled by the Condesce as soon as John zapped away.
Why do only some people act super weird in the Candy timeline? Karkat and John still remain themselves, while Roxy becomes completely lobotomized, and others only seem mildly changed? And why is it only for a brief moment? Does it have to do with John’s emotional state at any given time? Vriska seems to imply as much on Candy pg. 38. Or perhaps Roxy is right and they didn’t actually change that much at all? I honestly have no idea what's going on with all of that.
One explanation is that everyone is fine and nothing has changed but you have made a mistake here. John is fucking insane in candy.
My personal interpretation is that candy bassicly makes everyone act under a pseudo lollipop Juju effect based of Alt!Calliopes views on free will in Meat "yet he hesitates. his mind is still lying to itself, casting doubt on what it really wants. i don’t see a purpose in allowing his self-deceit to continue for much longer. it’s wrong to contradict one’s true thoughts and feelings. irrational. unbecoming of an existence governed by free will." Presumably this philosophy passes on to everyones thought processes in candy BUT THAT INCLUDES JOHN.
Why is the Candy timeline free from Dirk's influence? He clearly has the ability to be present in other timelines (see: Pesterquest)
Alt!Calliopes protection and also idk anything about pesterquest.
Why does the server that Meenah absconds into take her to Candy Earth C?
She goes into the server and then puts the ring of life on which ends up taking her to candy Earth C.
Why does Vrissy say she's "8asically Immortal?" Is she a god-tier? Or just extremely overconfident? (Candy, pg. 34)
(Nitpick) When did John ever get any experience with washing troll blood out of clothes? (Candy, pg. 36)
Prolly Terezi got some blood on his during game over along with the other fights in Collide.
Why do John's retcon powers stop working in the Candy timeline? He's unburdened by Canon, no?
We don't actually no for sure if they DID stop working.
What did Vriska say to Terezi on Candy pg. 37?
It literally says it at the end of the page "Hey Terezi. This isn’t John. It’s Vriska."
Did Dirk set up the White House transportalizer and Obama hologram? When? Why? How did he know Dave would find it? If it is actually Obama, why does he act so strange? His words and actions are completely in line with the goals of Dirk. If it is actually Dirk puppeting it, how is he doing so? How is he channeling the actual power of Hope while he is a hero of Heart?
It was just Obama. I am too lazy to give this any more attention.
Why does Dave see a great dark cloud as he's ascending? And why does he see Dirk for a moment? (Candy, pg. 39)
The dirk thing is presumably just his Ultimate self shit
Can Davebot or Rosebot die normal deaths? Or does the Heroic/Just immortality of their God forms continue even after their biological death?
Their bodies can yes.
Why does Davebot ask AltCalliope "DAVEBOT: so we doin this" When did they plan together? (Meat postscript)
I don't even know how to answer this.
What does it really mean to ascend, to become your Ultimate self?
We don't really know.
Why does Dirk say that Rose belongs to him after she ascends? (Meat, pg. 25)
this question is asking me to explain the concept of explain abuse to you, im not doing that
Why does Terezi only notice Dirk's narration after she goes to Earth C? He was narrating when she was near the Black Hole w/ John as well.
Presumably a range based thing.
Is Terezi's awareness of the narration due to her status as a Hero of Mind, or because she was in Canon for so long? Or perhaps a secret third thing?
Mind
Why does Calliope start scribbling things about the Candy timeline on the walls? (Meat, pg. 36)
Expanded in beyond canon
Why does Rose's body need to be kept alive to transfer her consciousness to Rosebot, while Dave's body does not need to be alive to transfer his consciousness to Davebot?
The answer is likely that Rose's body DOESN'T need to be kept alive and could be transferred into Rosebot like with Davebot but there are specific reasons why Dirk wants to keep her body alive. One could interpret it as a metaphor for how much control he has over her with the way he now has literal possession of her body. It could also be another way he keeps his control over, the threat that something could happen to her body. It also likely going to be plot relevant.
Is that the fucking Ring of Life on Hysterical Broad's hand?????? (Catnapped, pg. 24)
Jasprose literally says "I hope you two lovely ladies are enjoying your honeymoon. Don't overindulge!". Those are just normal wedding rings.
Who is narrating in black on BC pg. 144? It's clearly not Dirk, and it's also clearly not AltCalliope. Is it Hussie somehow? Is it MSPAR? Is it The Director? Does there have to be an in-story narrator in order for narration to exist?
Its just Dirk, he has just begun using black text when he wants to be more "impartial".
Why is Dirk afraid of Yiffy? (A Threat Sensed)
We dont know yet.
Why does Vrissy suddenly fall asleep on BC pg. 261?
Possibly Narcolepsy
Why are Davebot's shades red on BC pg. 278 when it's explicitly stated that he took his shades off of his own corpse in the
When/How did Aradia ascend?
She didn't.
Why/How can Dirk and Aradia be ascended without their bodies giving out?
Aradia isn't an ultimate self?!?!?!? Also Dirk is a special case due to his pre existing relationship to his splinters and just the sheer amount of time he has had to get comfortable with being split like that.
Why isn't Rosebot aware of the narration?
Prolly not fully ascended.
Why do Vrissy's mind control powers work on humans?
WE dont know.
Where are the new dream bubbles coming from? (BC pg. 589)
WE dont know.
Do Dirk's Bullshit Powers have limits? Or is he just straight up omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent.
Dirk's power is Being The Narrator, similar to doc scratch. he can do a timeskip because he says he can and its narratively convenient and whos saying otherwise? if allie was there she could probably just say "that doesn't work, you have to explain how it works" and his thing wouldnt work
What the FUCK is going on on BC pg. 719??? Who's that girl?
Presumably a future post transition version of John of undefined name (tho everyone uses June)
What exactly is happening on BC pg. 767? Is Vriska destroying the letters (if so, why?) or just taking them? (also if so, why?)
WE DON'T KNOW YET
How the hell are Jane and Jake on the ship w/ The Meat Gang? Did Vriska just yoink them from Midnight city and put them there? If so, why doesn't Karkat react more strongly to their presence? He acts like it's no big deal. Were they "already there," so to speak? How? Why did Vriska put them there?
WE DON'T KNOW YET
How did Hussie learn everything and gain all knowledge of what will happen? Clearly this isn’t something inherent to narrators.
Because they wrote homestuck.
Im being honest a lot of these questions sucked but there you go a vast majority answered.
Vriskafic8ion comes for us all ::::)
I am never doing somethinf like this again, answering that many questions was a mistake.
Vriskafic8ion comes for us all ::::)
some of these answers have spelling mistakes among other issues, sorry about that my brain was just melting towards the end.
Vriskafic8ion comes for us all ::::)