This forum has really made me start questioning things about myself...

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Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:04 PM13 days ago

Recently there has been an obvious amount of really weird transphobia on the site that was thankfully taken care of but the discussions people have about the characters in Homestuck being Trans or some other non-cis identity has really made me realize that I relate a lot to what people are saying about the characters.


And I think a lot of the horrible things people were saying about Andrew Hussie's clowngender made me realize that I also really relate to Genderqueer identity. I have always felt "genderless" in a way, and have never really resonated with labels like girl or boy, so the idea of someone taking a concept like "clown" as a gender was something that I just sort of understood from the get go, but also I kind of felt like I could do something like that for myself. (I have not played Pyscholonials even though everyone keeps saying to play Psycholonials T_T I am just too lazy but I will do it soon)


Anyways, I also felt personally like I've never been able to call myself genderqueer or align myself with that community because I wasn't taking it "seriously" or something lol (and really this is just because of what someone said in that now locked thread about how Hussie doesn't take their gender "seriously" so they don't have to respect it) But the idea of just being a "girl" also just does not fit with me like at all.


Reading a lot of trans people's analysis on Homestuck has given me a new perspective!


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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:05 PM13 days ago

Wow that was a lot of words, anyways I should play that game yall keep telling me to play.

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:24 PM13 days ago

im really glad to hear youre finding urself, a large section of the community is much nicer about this stuff and will be here for u

morningWillow
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:31 PM13 days ago

thanks this community is really nice and friendly, and also just generally more open about discussing gender without there being an icky air of "ew that gender stuff is so weird and gross".

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:36 PM13 days ago

Really happy to hear about you figuring yourself out. Good luck! :]

-- The Butch

Margot Kix
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:36 PM13 days ago

I guess a more apt way to put it is that I don't exactly resonate with the traditional idea of a girl or a woman. I wear Lolita fashion a lot but I do not feel more "womanly" in it, even if it is a highly femme style. It is easier for me to attribute my gender to things I have always really liked and cared about, which is that elegant style, rather than just say that I am a girl. There are definitely some Homestuck characters who I really related to because of their gender identity like Roxy and how they started to experiment with their gender expression and stuff.



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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 10:39 PM13 days ago

lol I really only came to this conclusion because a bunch of transphobic people came into a thread and basically started saying things about how Andrew Hussie isn't really trans or gender queer or whatever because he doesn't take it seriously or he jokes to much etc. And that is the exact kind of reasoning I have always used for myself for why I don't 'count' as gender queer, or why I wasn't 'valid" in the way I felt about my own gender. But I am staunchly in the camp that it is totally valid for someone's gender to just be clown, in the same way that I think my own gender would just be that of "lolita fashion" or "EGL"

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:10 PM13 days ago

That's a beautiful thing to read. Welcome home, welcome to genderqueerness! :)


Also, I've already said that in the trans/nonbinary chill zone ( https://www.fruityrumpus.com/forums/reply/6898a8b3c24c58e653cd3332 ), but THERE IS NO WRONG WAY TO BE TRANS, THERE IS NO WRONG WAY TO BE NONBINARY.


Everything you need to be nonbinary is the will and/or feeling to escape gender binarity. That's it. That's enough. Because there is no ontological, cosmically true way to have a gender, the very risk of being a "gender impostor" isn't a thing.

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Oasis Nadrama
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:12 PM13 days ago

i'm smiling and happy :) this is a good thread!! i hope you have a wonderful adventure. (can i call you ellyspin? i was gonna call you ellyspin because i like nicknames but like idk)

the epilogues are the best part of homestuck

lowe Shawthorn
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:18 PM13 days ago

Sure thing I dont mind nicknames lol but yk now that I have had this epiphany I am beginning to realize as well why my favorite homestuck characters are my "faves" to begin with. I know Karkat's whole quadrant conundrum thing can be seen as like a metaphor for someone who isn't sure about where they fit on a spectrum for sexuality, but I also related to his conundrum in regards to gender and the idea of someone not being able to place a name or figure themselves out when they have 4 options instead of just like "two options only" lol was relatable to me (but I couldn't really figure out why it was relatable to me just that it was)

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:21 PM13 days ago

And I also liked how nebulous and sort of vague the trolls genders were or rather what "parts" they have because I think it is just neat that was a mystery or whatever lol. The idea of everyone just "having the same parts" but being whatever they want anyways was nice to me.


I highkey fuck with that Nepeta Catgender headcanon so badly too, in fact I tried to google it to see if it was canon or whatever but meh I've been using Mew/Mewself for Nepeta for ages now so I am not stopping </3

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:22 PM13 days ago

nepeta is LITERALLY mrow :3

the epilogues are the best part of homestuck

lowe Shawthorn
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:22 PM13 days ago

My gender is basically agender catgirl or a genderless catgirl. I distance myself from gender because everything I tried gave me dysphoria and so I got frustrated one night, snuck on my DS internet browser and looked up "what word means without gender?" on Google and boom threw mine out the window. Catgirl is more the aesthetic and vibes I exude, agender is the core lack of gender for me; so, I relate to some of the stuff you said here in not having my gender taken seriously as I use the term women for myself jokingly or in cis-dominated settings or people use she/her for me because of my appearance when I'm a they/them mostly. Idk I'm rambling, just want you to know you're seen. 💜

Kanya hears "ERROR LOGGED OUT" & looks at Rose who just SAYS "NO 'FORGOT PASSWORD' OPTION" while frowning.

Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:23 PM13 days ago

yay congrats!!

I feel like p much everyone at some point (and sometimes multiple points) feels a little down on themselves for not being Whatever enough and that they arent a real one and all that but theres infinite ways to be a person and you can do whatever you want forever.

yippie!! \(^.=.^)/

A drawing of a red anthro wyvern holding a stylus with arm-wings open captioned "> Autumn: Retrieve wings."

Autumn
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:25 PM13 days ago

The only other thing is that i have no idea about pronouns I don't really have many qualms about them aside from I dislike He/Him for myself. Everything else is just fine by me though so I can't really like pick, which is why I've just had She/They all this time lol.

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:27 PM13 days ago

being is a universal state of rejecting not being despite infinite forces trying to make you not be, many of which come from within. it's inherently rebellious to exist instead of not because entropy and society have a pact that aims to embolden both of them to erase everyone and everything. it's inherently cool as fuck. it's inherently sick as shit to be. it's truly rooted in real levels of awesome to be and exist. it's also really cool and even funny to just say shit over and over again redundantly because that's like more being. i'm fighting entropy right now by being my strange goat self

the epilogues are the best part of homestuck

lowe Shawthorn
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:31 PM13 days ago

Yeah i can get behind that idea I like that. My gender is elegant clothing, or fashion styles, or bows or laces and frills etc. I have no other way to really like explain it other than it's that lol. I kinda wish people could have gender moodboards to get the general vibe across or something.

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elegantSpinstress
Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:39 PM13 days ago

@elegantspinstress I literally have an entire gender tag on my tumblr that is purely vibes based, you can have fun and do whatever you want forever. Make that moodboard, be fun, be free! <3

Kanya hears "ERROR LOGGED OUT" & looks at Rose who just SAYS "NO 'FORGOT PASSWORD' OPTION" while frowning.

Thursday, August 21st, 2025, 11:44 PM13 days ago

for pronouns i tend to say that "she/her" are my formal pronouns and "fae/faer" are my informal ones, since im not like Fully out irl (ppl selectively know) but also there have been times where i Omit the she/her just to spite ppl :V

and for why fae/faer? because its pretty :3 i like the fairy imagery it evokes I think it compliments my draconic ways p well. theres been people who have tried to come up with dragon-y pronouns but they are all too clunky to me. u-u

A drawing of a red anthro wyvern holding a stylus with arm-wings open captioned "> Autumn: Retrieve wings."

Autumn
Friday, August 22nd, 2025, 0:28 AM12 days ago

on the topic of that game you should play, the whole gender part that people argue over isn’t that far in if i remember correctly. it certainly reads as tongue in cheek in its presentation, but there is a ring of truth in it to me at least, as someone who has explored their gender been on HRT and all the funny stuff.

the idea that because hussie doesn’t care you can ignore their genderqueerness makes me roll my eyes because they made a full spectrum with examples on how they and others lie within it. would it be acceptable to repeatedly misgender someone because they don’t fight back hard enough? come on


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cyto
Friday, August 22nd, 2025, 0:39 AM12 days ago

I have never agreed with that idea that because someone doesn't take a part of their identity seriously that then means they are not valid. I mean, before today I used to have this inner struggle with being a Lesbian and what not and would have all sorts of silly debates in my own head about how I wasn't really a "real lesbian" for all sorts of reasons. I think the idea that Queer people have to take every facet of their identity serious and can never be somewhat lax on how they define themselves just does more harm than good lol. And also its just kind of rude a person should not have to come out in a way that pleases other people.

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elegantSpinstress
Topic: This forum has really made me start questioning things about myself...