Why is Dirk afraid of Yiffy?

Anyways, I have had time to make peace with Yiffy she's my daughter now I can't hear you haters over the sound of my pen hitting the adoption papers.

this is peak interpretation and im gonna steal it now, thank you.

You're welcome to also I like that Yiffy hates her name and is also just as angry about all of this as the readers are. Her anger is OUR anger.

Because seven ate nine!! xD Sorry, I am just kidding around. Your theory seems very plausible.

I always thought it was like first guardian genes but the green sun is gone, at least for right now.

I like your theory though more lol idk if I see the green sun returning

I think part of it could be that it would sidetrack meat!rose/rosebot and make her less interested in dirk's scheming if she finds out she has an alternate universe daughter, either vrissy or yiffy. I imagine she would have complex feelings about the whole thing which is not good for scheming.

from what we know about yiffy's backstory she seems to be tough, constantly pissed off, lashes out in whatever way possible at the moment with little regard for consequences (stomping on gamzee's coffin at the funeral), and has zero respect for authority. In a literal sense I think it's that she's a threat to his power fantasy roleplay but I also agree with how she messes with the story dirk is trying to tell for the audience!

yiffys nonbinary aura

yeah it's yiffy's nonbinary aura

I also think the newer update plays into this and that it's foreshadowing for Dirk eventually losing control over the narrative. Dirk admits he can't see anything happening in Candy and could only see because Calliope made a tear for a moment that he could peek into. What if when the Earth C Kids get to Deltritus he starts to realize that there are things he's unaware of because he isn't able to see everything, everywhere, all at once (ref)

My prediction is that it will be like how Roxy's POV was blacked out because of her void powers but on a larger, stronger scale because this time the thing being blotted out will be Dirk's view of the characters.

Es' point is intriguing to me but the idea of something being outside of his perview due to metaphysics feels off to me, maybe it could be something along the lines of a matter of self control, seeing our dear yiffany as too stupid of a plot point? she is sort of a glaring example of the sort of shacking up and making babies and relationship drama he hates so much about candy

I personally cant bring myself to like or care about the candy timeline kids I just feel bad for their situations/ upbringing and don't really like the whole relationship thing going on with them I find it gross and they're boring to me. But one thing I feel everyone glosses over ab yiffy in particular is the inclusion of longstocking in her name. I say this because pippi longstocking is a real fictional character I remember watching the 97' show ab her when I was a kid so the longstocking part of yiffy is something that either adds to the absurdity of yiffys existence but also pippi is also originally a swedish BOOK series about a young girl with superhuman strength notably being able to lift up her horse friend with one hand (it all goes back to horses) her monkey, and her disdain for authority in the town she lives in and refusal to grow up (more on the wikipedia page for it) and her two friends she meets in the village. but what I find notable in just a quick wiki of her is that she doesn't grow up. the story of Homestuck is definetly all about subverting societal conventions and norms within the frame of the narrative in og homestuck but its still all about growing up. pippi and yiffy can most definitely share in the aspect of refusal to grow up after all many stories are about "growing up" but when you see what becomes of peope when they "grow up" through all the shitty adults in your life you definetly wouldn't want to and dirk needs a story to write yiffy is the antithesis of dirks goal of control and maintaining an ongoing story and what better way than constant character development via "growing up" (or a whole new session and world with new kids that will have to go through this system all over again) also as of the recent update with vriska taking the candy kids to the meat timeline it also goes back to pippi as pippi in the books had pirates for parents before having to live alone with her horse and monkey in the village with only a pouch of gold.vriska in this case could e the pirate parent bringing yiffy to the village(meat timeline) and causing the adults and authority figures there(dirk) trouble and unable to do anything about her.

I do remember Pippi longstocking! I used to watch the cartoon that would air on Qubo a lot growing up, and I definitely agree with your interpretation of her name lol. Even though she hates her name, I fear "Longstocking" was the only part of it that actually showcases who she is as a person, which is someone who rebels against the very nature of authority and control. And one could even say that this will take place in the form of narrative control .

that or she will somehow solo dirk lol

I did have this theory that Dirk thinks he will be a character who's above the rest of them, but he's actually setting himself up to be like Caliborn and become the "big evil bad guy" that they all have to defeat in the end. The way to win the game is to actually beat the fuck out of the guy who made you play the game to begin with. The OG cast of Homestuck never actually got a chance to beat the fuck out of Hussie and make him stop lol (besides Vriska) but Dirk is a character that they can actually stop. That, and the OG characters never really had a chance to stop the horrible cycle of abuse in their childhoods. Dave never won against his brother, Rose never actually reconciled with her mom, Jade never got to be raised by her grandpa and learn the truth of his death until years later, and John never got over the death of his father after playing the game and "winning".

The new kids however have a whole new chance to get away from all of the toxic cycle AND break it (by beating the fuck out of Dirk Strider)

i also thought that despite her seemingly being a potential wildcard and ppl are assuming shes a rage player I think she could be another heart player one that can rival dirk and force him to really look into the one thing he hates (himself) and who wouldn't be scared of that confrontation I'm not a classpector and hell most of classpecting is assumptions so yiffy heart player 2025???

I think I can understand the heart classpecting theory because she's very torn up about the name and her origins, namely her identity as a person. She's a literal plot contrivance made to make people angry and I could see that her deciding to love herself anyways despite a lot of people not liking her, making her a heart player since Heart players tend to be "self-absorbed" but I think in the case of Yiffy it'd be less her caring only about herself or whatever, and only being able to look at her relationships with other people through the lens that she's an inconvenience and not "supposed to be here" essentially.

But we haven't even really seen a lot from her outside of these forums (if you try to name yourself Yiffy or any of her names when you sign up for FRAF you actually get dialogue from her which is cool!) And the description for the Heart aspect really does match up a little with the way things are going now if you think about it in that way.

i also can't wait to see where this angle goes!!! i completely agree, i think the fear of someone who 'doesn't make sense' becoming a main character whom the story follows around is terrifying to someone like ult!dirk. he has bet absolutely everything on homestuck (the story) needing to exist and progress in a very specific manner in order for he + his friends to be 'safe' (though this is speculative on my part, i imagine his reasoning for this is the idea that when homestuck fades from relevance in the audience's mind, the characters in it suffer a kind of death. and also the idea that giving the story a proper, closed loop ending - unlike collide - would prevent the amount of fanon speculation that morphed it into that house of leaves' style beast we see in the neo dream bubbles).

but if a character as batshit on paper as yiffy can become loved, and can embody the pillars of canon (being relevant, true, and essential to the story of homestuck)... then what does that say about everything dirk's sacrificed to get here?

also while so far i haven't really bet anything on any of the new kids' classpects (aside from lylac being doom. idc if its bait, ive fallen for it hook line and sinker!) i would kind of love it if yiffy was destructive mind. both on the meta level of 'thinking about yiffy breaks people's brains + ability to be logical, as their gut instinct of 'what the fuck i hate it!' takes over', and also the in-universe level of her rejecting and standing against all the justifications the adults tell to themselves + others as to why they're acting like this. jade + june's insane argument about the kids and how they should/shouldn't live means shit-all to a well placed 'FUCK YOU!!!!!' that rejects their authority over the matter entirely.

im a big fan of the theory that yiffy was a sort of 5D chess move from rose made as a sort of counter to dirk. its tied in with the "gloves are canon" theory i saw on tumblr a while back, that postulated the "hussie" in a threat sense was actually rose wearing gloves, and that the obama hologram in candy was potentially rose speaking through him.

the theory, if you're curious:

(part 1)https://www.tumblr.com/girlbowser/753474481802100736

(part 2) https://www.tumblr.com/girlbowser/753478726425231360/what-exactly-does-gloves-is-canon-mean-if-you

(part 3) https://www.tumblr.com/girlbowser/767785195552276480/part-3-was-that-rose-was-obama-and-that-she?source=share

its also sort of tied in with my theory that yiffy is a rage player, as rage is an aspect that, when its in play, is trying to get you to stop caring about homestuck, which is sort of what yiffys entire existence is about. this observation about rage is shared by both tex talks (an old youtuber who made claspect analysis videos like a decade ago before seemingly vanishing off the face of the earth) and pgenpod (i don't remember what episode but i remember it was a thing mentioned there)