>check out your sick ass posters

This is your Slim Shady poster. Probably the best ever to do it. Nobody else comes close, except maybe Eminem. You used to to blast the likes of "I'm Slim Shady", "Habits", and "Fuel" while cooking, but of course MR. WHITE immediately shut it down. "Drivel," he called it. You had never been so pissed off in your life.

A couple years ago you had this poster made of your brother, Jake. He exists in the world and is Jake, so you keep this poster to remind you of that fact.

This is an ad for some new game, Sburb? Usually, if Sonic ain't there you ain't buyin', but one of your best friends has been badgering you about it for ages now, saying once you play it you'll finally see what he sees. So, what the hell. You'll give it a try this afternoon before your next cook.