>HANNAH: Baclown burger review NOW.

Too late, you already ordered the Poppy burger to keep your lame promise. You can see the poor minimum wage worker they make wear the clown nose bringing you your colourful baggy and massive soda cup. You stare into his eyes and his resigned eyes let you know that he's not a big clown guy, he's just here for the paycheck. You share a thin lipped grimace of people in jobs they dislike and customers who know all too well what they're feeling.

>HANNAH: Ponder what might be on your friend's new Signature Menu Item™.

You remove it from the bag and wow, what is this thing. The buns look way too saturated with artificial dye to be healthy, and the little paper cutout parts of the face stuck in with toothpicks are already slicked with grease and will probably fold and darken soon. The sauce on it is the same consistency as the normal white sauce but it's old bubblegum pink. Other than that you think it's probably the same stuff as the other burgers.
You wonder if it's more or less ethical to pick your friend's facial features off one by one before biting into her burger head. You sort of expected it to just have her rubber duck motif and having her look up at you out of the back took you aback.