Fuck everything else I want Pwn Noobert to be his canon name and have it so every instance of "John Egbert" is retroactively changed to Pwn Noobert
░█▀▄░█░█░█▀█░░█▀▀░▀█▀░█▀▀░█▀█░
░█░█░█░█░█▀▀█░▀▀█░░█░░█▀▀░█▀▀░
░▀▀░░▀▀▀░▀▀▀▀░▀▀▀░░▀░░▀▀▀░▀░░░