I have never agreed with that idea that because someone doesn't take a part of their identity seriously that then means they are not valid. I mean, before today I used to have this inner struggle with being a Lesbian and what not and would have all sorts of silly debates in my own head about how I wasn't really a "real lesbian" for all sorts of reasons. I think the idea that Queer people have to take every facet of their identity serious and can never be somewhat lax on how they define themselves just does more harm than good lol. And also its just kind of rude a person should not have to come out in a way that pleases other people.